people crossing crosswalk

Things We Love to Hate: Deceit Edition

By Damn Joan Staff

These are a few of our least favorite things.

• • •

 

  1. Coachella.

  2. People who refer to Coachella as “Chella.”

  3. When impossibly cute kittens and puppies grow into average-looking cats and dogs. See also: babies.

  4. Whoever thought we needed a Roseanne revival. And whoever hasn't canceled it yet.

  5. “That takes balls.”

  6. Choking on homemade matcha because you were trying to save money and the whole frothing thing is too much to do in the morning.

  7. Micromanagers. 

  8. Crosswalk countdowns that give you four seconds to make it across the street. 

  9. The 17-year waiting period between now and the time Emma González becomes eligible to run for president. The only waiting period we oppose.

  10. Aesthetically pleasing restaurants with taste-bud-displeasing food.

  11. People who leave drawers and cabinets half open. Decide.

  12. The questionable logic of Easter.

  13. Trailers that are significantly more entertaining than the movies they’re advertising.

  14. Long-distance friendships. Don’t move. 

  15. Learning the truth about Cambridge Analytica, which is not only not an encyclopedia but also nefarious and evil.

  16. Which reminds us: Mark Zuckerberg.

  17. Reaching the moment in a relationship with new shoes when you can’t tell if they still need to be broken in or they will be uncomfortable forever.  

  18. The knowledge that you will keep wearing them anyway based on price and cuteness.

  19. People who keep the brightness on screens all the way up. Flip a switch if you need that much light.

  20. The looming dread of what Trump will tweet on Cinco de Mayo. 

 

Crosswalk image: Unsplash.
4-16-2018